It’s that time of year, folks!
The world tells us it’s the happy season, or the silly season, and wants you to go out and buy stuff in the spirit of happiness, and share it with your loved ones.
As Annie sang in the 80s, “Sweet dreams are made of this, who am I to disagree?”
Am I going to grow an aversion to money now that everyone’s swiping cards and phones like they’re shooing flies?
Nee wat, I’ll join in the chorus and chime in on a high note, “show me the money!”
But we’ve got something for you, in return for your hard-earned cash.
It’s a really good nut butter.
So good is this nut butter that Trump himself has expressed interest in it.
Okay, that’s a lie. Fake News, as Mr. Trump would say.
But it would be awesome if Trump or Elon Musk shows interest.
Actually, they’d be doing themselves a favour.
Lush Yummy nut butter is filled with the stuff they need to Make America Great Again.
And like Musk, our nut butter is a premium South African product.
And like Musk, our nut butter is anti-woke, too. The similarities are electric; out of this world! (Did you catch those?)
By buying our nut butter, you’re supporting people who love pre-born women and men.
Furthermore, the guys behind Lush Yummy nut butter have no problem saying that there are two genders, biologically, and that men pretending to be women should not be competing in female sports, even if they’re using a brilliant nut butter as part of their dietary regime.
No, if you’re XY, get in the ring with a man. Y? Because that’s how God made you, man!
And last, but not least, the guys behind Lush Yummy nut butter have no problem wishing everyone a politically incorrect Merry Christmas.
But wait, there’s more!
Not only is our nut butter politically incorrect, it also tastes phenomenal. Ask those who’ve had the privilege of tasting it. (Okay, don’t ask my two buddies who didn’t like it; they don’t count.)
And here’s an even more important point (apparently): our nut butter is nutritious. It contains only natural ingredients aimed at helping you be healthier.
By choosing our nut butter, you’re investing in common sense, because you’re allowing a natural product past your head’s gate (That’s your mouth, by the way, not any of the other cavities.) into that sensitive machine called your body.
For that machine to run optimally, it needs the right kind of fuel, and our nut butter is just that.
So start investing in a healthier you by buying Lush Yummy nut butter.
It’s easy.
Click the buy button, and purchase your nut butter online. We deliver anywhere in South Africa.
Once again, Merry Christmas.
May God bless you and yours.
And may your 2025 be incredible.