Making nut butter is a mission.
The way I’m making it, in any case.
I’m about to transition to using a grain mill for grinding my nut butter ingredients. Until now, I’ve used a food processor, which has a propensity to try to jump off the counter if not kept in place by a firm hand.
Even though it’s a mission, I enjoy making nut butter.
I’ve mentioned before that it combines two things men identifying as male guy dudes enjoy: switching off and grinding out.
While the little food processor is jumping around on the counter, struggling to chew on the double mouthful of ingredients I force-feed it, looking for an opportunity to slip from underneath my grip to plummet to the ground, I stand there thinking far off male thoughts, or not thinking at all, just staring, all the while enjoying chucking stuff together, measuring, blending, and repeating.
It’s a lot of work, but it’s enjoyable.
The best part?
When you’ve filled up all the jars with nut butter and have to clean up.
Cos it’s licking time!
Time to disassemble all the food processor’s parts, scooping off the remaining nut butter into a big spoon and sucking on that puppy.
Then using a teaspoon to scrape off every morsel of nut butter you can reach in and around every nook, cranny and crevice of the food processor, blades, and containers you used in the production process.
If I’m having so much fun in my micro nut butter clean-up process, what are the CEOs of top nut butter companies doing?
Do they jump into large cauldrons filled with nut butter, and doggy-paddle through the nut butter, taking huge gulps sporadically?
Is it like Scrooge McDuck when he dives into his money?
Ah man, I can only dream of reaching those heights.
If you’re the CEO of a big nut butter company, please get in touch and tell me what it’s like.
Maybe send a pic of you lathering yourself in nut butter.
Or don’t.
That would just be sierjaslie awkward; can’t even believe you brought that up.
Don’t send me pics of that sort.
But maybe we can be buds or something.
We can have nut butter swimming parties.
At your place, of course.